whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
