in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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