Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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