i will never coherently bang her
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
