I feel like abortions should bother me more
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
