He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
