Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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