Whod you bang
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize