Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Randomize