You can't motorboat a personality
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize