About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
