OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize