gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
