My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
