Already got asked if we're dating
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
