Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
