Can Purell be used as lube?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
