you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
