Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
