Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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