If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
