Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
porn star boner night. come get it.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Just pee around me
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
