Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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