Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
