Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
He did a backflip because drugs
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize