i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
