Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
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