Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
