Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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