I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
we're making bets on your personal life
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
