Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I am naked and annoyed.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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