THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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