Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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