North Korea, Best Korea!
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
