It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
