It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
