All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize