His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
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