We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize