i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
