the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
