I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
she smelled like a LAN party
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
