sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize