i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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