I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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