wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
