its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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