I wish I could punch you in the face.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize