I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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