Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize