Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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